Why childhood should be more like an oak tree

Why slow growth, strong foundations and understanding development matter in childhood

'Mighty oaks from little acorns grow.'

It’s a phrase many of us know, but recently I’ve found myself thinking about it differently.

Oak trees do not become mighty overnight. They grow slowly, season by season.

Roots deepen. Branches strengthen. Leaves unfold. And perhaps most importantly, much of their growth happens without us even realising it's happening.

The more I reflected on this, the more I realised childhood is not all that different. Having my own two boys, and seeing them both on different journeys at different times has really made it stand out to me how my viewpoints and values have shifted.

The world we live in often celebrates visible growth and those big milestones. Learning to talk, walk and read can begin to feel like the goals of childhood - things for our children to work towards. Now, of course, they do matter. But if we only focus on reaching those points, we risk missing the wonder of the seasons children go through to get there.

It also may mean that we are missing out on giving our child the time to build the strong, secure foundations that all of their future learning and development is built upon.

If we prop them up to sit, they're missing out on time to develop transitional poses and the ability and strength needed to get themselves in and out of the position themselves.

If we hold their hands to walk too early, they're missing out on the necessary opportunities to practise strength building, balance and coordination.

If we teach them letters and words before they've got strong foundations, they might be able to tell you what they say, but they'll have missed out on the development of crucial pre-reading/pre-phonics skills which are needed to support the learning later on down the line.

Childhood, and the development that happens within it, is not a race. Children are constantly growing in ways we cannot always see. And sometimes, growth does not always look like progress. It might instead look like things such as repetitive play, or needing more connection and reassurance.

It's time to lessen the comparisons. Lessen the pressure.

And start offering more trust, more connection and more time instead.

This is something that I'm still really working on with my own boys. It's a journey for us too to get to this point.

And... it doesn’t mean children should never be challenged. Oak trees still weather seasons. They bend, they adapt, they keep growing - but still, this happens in their own time.

All of this is why the oak has become such an important symbol for The Know & Play Space.

Childhood deserves strong roots, solid foundations, meaningful experiences, space to unfold and time to become.

Mighty oaks weren't rushed, and perhaps our children shouldn't be either.

Continue exploring:

Introducing The Seasons of Childhood

The Guidance Library